Train Ride to SLO

As Mr. Hogan and Sash hopped on the Amtrak at the train station in Irvine, CA, they were excited to have their own sleeping car to enjoy their trip with a little more intimacy. You can bring your own beer, wine and spirits when you have your own room, so they did not hesitate when the opportunity arose. “Let’s get saucey!” hollered Mr. Hogan. They just found this out when reading the Amtrak website, so they brought some of their own SLO Coast wines since they were headed to San Luis Obispo. Mr. Hogan was a High School teacher at Mission Viejo High in South Orange County where he grew up. He taught Music History playing and breaking down music from all eras in his classroom. He was big into Phish, so he taught high schoolers about this traveling rock and roll band from Vermont that never played a set the same at any show in their impressive 40-year career. It allowed him to play a different show each Phish day throughout the school year. Sash, his wife of 10 years was a fashionista who grew up in Mission Viejo also. The two would go to hip-hop shows, raves, jam band concerts and other shows all across the country. They had a special bond that connected them outside of their high school dating life. Sash had a vibe about her that you could not describe. She let her attitude and style talk for her. She loved New York and traveled often for fashion shows and business and knew how to make things happen. They were a match made in heaven and always stuck by each other’s sides even when the shit hit the fan.

As they found their sleeping cart, they pulled out the glasses, popped open the cork and now the wine was breathing. The aromas shot out of the bottle like a sporting event gun that shoots out t-shirts. They did not wait for it to open up and just poured full glasses. As they looked around the cart, the first thing they both thought about was how can we shag in here? They both loved sex, especially when drinking wine. Mr. Hogan was tall and buff, black hair and always in fashion. Sash was hot. She had straight black hair with great curves and always had the perfect high-end handbag to go with her high heels and perfect outfits. They grabbed their glasses and raised them saying, “Let’s get it on!” After they both took a big drink of the Pinot, they started heavily making out and the heavy petting turned into more heated action. The tops came off, then the pants and then the under garments. They were naked and going at it around the room pretty aggressively. It was a different experience for them because they were flying down the railroad tracks around Fountain Valley. They both finished the intimacy as desired and now the wine had perfectly opened up for another big gulp.

Beckham picks up Mr. Hogan and Sash at the SLO Train Station

As Mr. Hogan and Sash put their clothes back on, they were a little sweaty and still breathing hard. They don’t mess around in the bedroom, they get after it. And in sleeping carts too apparently. “That was hot, let’s get back to this wine.” Sash said with her heart still beating hard. Mr. Hogan was on Spring Break so he had a whole week off. They planned their trip months ago and we’re going to get picked up by their friend Beckham who owns Firestone Grill in SLO. He works a hundred hours a week, but always made time for his friends. Beckham was incredibly good-looking and very single. He had perfect black hair and women would come to Firestone just to get a look at him. He loves providing his steak and bbq to his female guests. Mr. Hogan knew Beckham from Cal Poly where he got his teaching credential. They were roommates and Mr. Hogan worked at the restaurant during the summers. It was a great job and working with his friend made it fun. Beckham was an amazing boss but would lay down the hammer when Mr. Hogan would get behind on cutting the Tri-tip sandwiches. With the line down the street often, it would start cranking and even the best would get behind.

Mr. Hogan was Cal Poly Men’s Basketball all-time leading scorer. He earned a full-ride scholarship to come be a Mustang and take the program to the tournament for the second time. When he played he had long black hair with a full beard and headband. He rotated green, white and occasionally a tie dyed for special games. He was Orange County Player of the Year averaging 42 points and 17 rebounds per game and he was only six two. He could jump out of the gym and sometimes literally would end up outside of Mott. Mott Gym it used to be called. He was a beast on the glass and dropped dimes like Jason Kidd. The funny part was Mr. Hogan partied hard and somehow lead the conference and team in scoring all four years he played. No one knew how he did it. He never played high, but always talked like he was. He was a big dreamer and into psychedelic jam band music like Phish, the Grateful Dead, Steve Kimock and the String Cheese Incident. The ironic thing was he was a die hard country music fan. You would have thought he was from Texas with his Wranglers, cowboy boots and cowboy hats. He drank an 18 pack of Coors Light cans every night and sweated it out with his other teammates during practice and games. The team was never near his level when it came to partying and dunking the basketball.

San Luis Obispo, CA

After another gulp of wine, they starting feeling the affects of the Pinot Noir. The room became tinted with purple and time seemed to stop when the wine filled their loose bodies. Relaxed from the sexual activity and wine, they started up some conversation about their plans when they got to San Luis. “I definitely want to go to Firestone Grill.” Mr. Hogan excitedly started the discussion. “I want to go to Flour House.” said Sash. They were staying at Hotel Cerro a newer more modern hotel in downtown SLO, so they needed to be able to walk around when Beckham was working at the Grill, which was most of the time. They were going to start at the Italian restaurant Café Roma because it was right when they hopped off the train. “Did you know Café Roma was established by the Rizzo family in 1980 and was one of San Luis Obispo’s first finer dining locations. They have a great monthly wine list filled with wines from Paso, SLO Coast, Santa Barbara, Napa, France and Italy. The Italian cuisine is authentic with with handmade pasta and locally sourced ingredients from farmers, ranchers, fishermen, and vintners.” “No, I didn't, it sounds amazing. I can’t wait.” said Sash. The two were flying through LA now and Mr. Hogan had something to say to Sash. “Let’s do it again.”

As they took their last sip of the Pinot, the clothes rapidly came off again. They were extra loose now and ready for some more intimacy, so they got down to business quickly. Sash’s tan and naked curves always got Mr. Hogan so it didn’t take long for them to start going down on each other. One thing lead to the other and they were going at it once again. As the unique session ended they were already in Santa Barbara County. The coast was sparkling as the sun shined down onto the water. They were happy to be out of the city so they celebrated and opened up a 2021 Sandhi White Buffalo Land Trust Pinot Noir from Santa Rita Hills to go with the area and scenery. Santa Rita Hills is a sub-region of the Santa Ynez Valley AVA in between the small towns of Lompoc and Buellton lying on the Central Coast. The region makes some of the finest Chardonnay and Pinot Noir in the world. By now they were beyond relaxed after the bottle of Pinot and the back to back train sex. “I can’t wait to go to Bubble Gum Alley Mr. Hogan softly said. “I can’t wait to go to Woodstock’s.” They both have been to SLO quite a few times, but it had been a while since they were last there. They were staying Friday to Sunday so they knew where they wanted to go but were also glad to have Beckham show them some new spots. They were curious where he was going to take them because there have been quite a few restaurants go in and out of business in SLO over the years. But the best still remain.

On July 17th, 1998, Mr. Hogan decided to go to a Phish show at the Gorge Amphitheatre in Washington State for his 42nd show. He went by himself and traveled to the venue by car from San Luis Obispo when he was off of basketball in the Summer. His friends were going to be there, so he was enthusiastic to meet up with them since he hadn’t seen them in a couple of years. As a whole the phriends have been to hundreds of shows and were flying out of John Wayne Airport in Santa Ana to attend the concert. Phish phans travel from all over the country to view these one of kind live shows. They have a Grateful Dead like following who are committed to the musical brilliance of Trey Anastasio, Mike Gordon, Page McConnell and Jon Fishman. Their popularity grew faster after Jerry Garcia from the Grateful Dead passed away in 1995. They are their own unique band, but they are similar to the Dead when it comes to long improvised jams that can go on for 20 plus minutes multiple times during the show. The Dead’s following got to continue an out of this world musical journey similar to theirs prior. There are a lot of Grateful Dead tie-dyes at Phish shows. During the second set, the Mike’s Song came on and Mr. Hogan was peaking simultaneously on the mushrooms and molly he ingested at the beginning of the show. The build up was strong, dark and heavy and they magically blended the roaring lead guitar into a blissful and soft jam that made everyone’s heart and brains melt. Mr. Hogan’s friends were on the same concoction and wavelength all at the same time, so there was this intergalactic tribe within an even bigger one with the audience. As the beautiful jam ended, Phish went into a firing and funky Weekapaug Groove to turn things back up.

As Mr. Hogan and Sash arrived at the train station, Beckham was their waiting in his white Ford F-250. It was decked out and had a bunch of red oak firewood in the back for the restaurant’s smoker. “What’s up Hogi!” Beckham hollered and hugged his close friend. “Hey Sash, you look beautiful as always.” “You are not looking too bad yourself.” Sash replied trying not to blush. Beckham was the best looking guy in the county by far and could easily be a Hollywood actor if he wasn’t running his family’s four restaurants. They decided to eat at Café Roma since it was right there by the train station. Beckham was then going to run by the Grill real quick. “This Italian food is so authentic.” Sash said while eating her Pappardelle with Short Rib Ragu. After a couple of bottles of wine, mostly consumed by the couple, they finished up their linner and hopped in Beckham’s truck and off to Firestone they went. Beckham was going to run in and attend to his tritips while they stayed in the car. With the windows down, they smelt the bbq from the parking lot and looked forward to coming back for a meal the following day. The couple was staying with Beckham so that was their last stop of the night. They were going to eat in, so they ordered Pizza Republic, drank some beer, then a little whiskey and called it a day.

Mr. Hogan and Sash woke up to the pleasant aromas of some French pressed coffee made by Beckham’s wife Gloria. She was very kind, but very hot. The couple were a perfect match with their good looks and great bodies. Beckham had to go to work, but wanted to take the couple to Louisa’s for breakfast downtown on Higuera St. across from Firestone Grill. The original Louisa’s was named The Best Ever Grill and was opened in 1958 at the same location. It is a town favorite for college kids, their families, tourists and locals alike. It is like being at an old diner transporting you back in time. Beckham parked in the Firestone parking lot and they walked over to the diner. There was a small line but Beckham got to just walk in and got three seats at the diner bar right away. They sat down, were given menus and served more coffee. They ordered Kuuipo's Hawaiian Omelette, Bacon and eggs sunny side up and the Sourdough French Toast and enjoyed every single bite. They walked out full and ready to walk it off downtown. They planned on heading to Firestone in a couple hours for lunch so they decided to check out some local shops and enjoy the warm sun and fresh air. It was pretty busy but entertaining, watching everyone go up and down the main drag. They walked over to look at the San Luis Obispo Creek and enjoyed the sounds of the birds chirping and water flowing. After buying a few things it was time to walk back to the Grill. As they were getting closer that bbq smell was back and they followed it right into the bar where Beckham had two seats ready for them. Mr. Hogan was happy to see his friend and bartender Neon arrive asking them what they wanted to drink. “Two Bloody Mary’s please” replied Mr. Hogan.

As the drinks were being delivered, Mr. Hogan saw his buddy Oz walk in the door out of the corner of his eye. There he was 6’8”, blond hair and could shoot the lights out. He was the wizard alright. He knocked down threes like they were going out of style. “Ozer!” Mr. Hogan joyfully yelled to his ex-teammate. “Oz this is my wife Sash, Sash, this is Oz.” “Nice to meet you Oz.” Sash looked up at him and got all giddy from his confident energy. Oz was very attractive and with his height he was always very good with the ladies, so it wasn’t a surprise when Sash started obviously blushing. “What are you doing here?” asked Oz surprised to see his good friend sitting right in front of him. “We took the train up and are staying with Beckham. We leave tomorrow.” “So are you coming downtown tonight?” “Yes! Beckham is our ride so we are staying down here ready to party until he is off.” After both ordering Tri-tips they looked over and saw the long line out the door and down the street. They then looked at Beckham behind the grill and realized he was cranking out Tri-tips right in the middle of a massive rush. He looked like it didn’t phase him one bit and his staff somehow kept their composure looking like a well-oiled machine. As the couple watched in awe, their Tri-tips and basket of half fries, half onion rings were delivered lightning fast. It was unbelievable to watch. Right as Neon dropped off the food, Mr. Hogan happily asked, “Can we have two shots of Don Julio Blanco?”

As the shots came up, they did a cheers, took the shots and followed them with some fresh limes. “Oh yeah!” Mr. Hogan hollered after the smooth shot went down. “How about a couple Margis!” he asked Neon. “Let’s go to Mother’s Tavern tonight!” Sash excitedly voiced. “How about Bulls!” followed Mr. Hogan. They were so happy to be in SLO they could not stop smiling. The weather was incredible, around 77 degrees and there was this magnificent ocean breeze that just softened up the heat. About half way through with their Tritips, their Margarita’s were gone and they were ready for some beer. Mr. Hogan ordered an IPA and Sash ordered a Coors Light. The drinks came up lightening fast again and they were back to their drinks, sandwiches and fries. They were pretty buzzed by this time, so they needed to get up and take a step outside to get some fresh air. They noticed the new overhang covering the patio that brought shade while also covering the patio during the rain. They went and sat down with their drinks as one table just opened up, appearing to be just for them. The patio was packed with what you could tell were locals, families, Cal Poly students and tourists. As the day passed, it was now night time and the couple was pretty drunk. They were big drinkers so they were fine, but they didn’t look much different from the wasted Poly students that were arriving downtown.

As they walked up to Mother’s Tavern there was a long line so they moved on to the Library next door, which was as packed, just less of a line. The hip-hop music was bumping and blasting out into the street. It was a zoo of Cal Poly kids along with some local professionals that hit downtown every weekend. After two beers and two shots they moved over next door to Buffalo Pub & Grill, which had a great vibe and had some open space for them to walk in and grab a couple drinks. They were drinking Bud Lights, so they were not completely shit-faced by this point. They had two more beers and two more shots of tequila and they were on their way. “Let’s go to Bulls!” said Sash crossing the street stumbling but keeping it together. When they arrived at Bulls, it was packed. There was a decent size line, but the couple only visits so often so they had to go in the legendary bar while in town. After twenty minutes of waiting in line, they finally were let in and it was loud. Loud from everyone in there along with the music blasting through the speakers. It was hard for them to grab a drink, but they finally got a couple more Bud Lights to follow their tequila shots. The two were shit-canned by now and after four more beers, it was time to go. As they walked out, downtown was buzzing with action. They were in awe of the energy and amazing warm weather at night time. “I am going to call Beckham and see if he is done yet.” “Yo! We are shit-housed are you done?’ Mr. Hogan said yelling over the phone and not realizing it. “Come down to the Grill and we will go home.” said Beckham wiped out from his long day. Mr. Hogan and Sash walked over to the Grill and were greeted by Beckham with two Tritips wrapped in foil ready for them to eat on the way home.

“Thanks Bud!” Mr. Hogan said slurring his words fumbling around trying to get into the truck. Mr. Hogan was so wasted that they just threw him in the back and Sash sat in shotgun. The smell of the tritip was seeping through the foil and the aromas on Beckham’s clothes were barbeque sauce, sweat and steak. As the very drunk couple bit into the sandwich, they instantly lost their minds. It was a match made in heaven. Being wasted and eating a Firestone Tritip. After eating half of the sandwich they got back to Beckhams, they went and passed out in one of Beckhams five guest bedrooms. When they woke up, they smelt the breakfast that Beckham’s wife made for them. Beckham went to work at 4am and drove to Fresno to count the money from last night. They struggled to get up as they were both extremely hungover and feeling like shit. Their train was leaving at noon, so they were going to eat breakfast and head over in Beckham’s wife’s Mercedes Benz. After slowly eating their breakfast, they got dressed and headed over to the train station. Before getting to the station, they wanted to stop by Gus’s Grocery to get a 12 pack of beer for the ride home. “Well, thank you so much for letting us stay. It meant the world to us. Tell Beckham thank you. We want to do this again”. said Sash giving a hug and goodbye. “Thank you we, we love you!” and Mr. Hogan grabbed their bags where they arrived just on time. They got on the train and went straight to their sleeping car. Pretty buzzed again from the Mimosas and Bloody Mary’s they had during breakfast, they opened up the twelve pack pulled two out and cracked them open. “That was the best trip, I had so much fun. We didn’t even have to drive, that was amazing.” said Sash feeling energized and enthusiastic. When they got to Santa Barbara they decided it was time to take their buzz to the next level and test out the bed. They did it three times on the way home and finished the twelve pack. They arrived back in Irvine with time completely flying because they never even looked at their phones to see the arrival time. As they stepped off the train, there was their friend … to pick them up and take them back to Mission Viejo. “How did it go?” … asked the couple. “It was incredible. We were drunk the whole time!” said Mr. Hogan. “How was San Luis Obispo?” Mr. Hogan had a huge smile and said. “It was wonderful, it’s just not SLOW anymore.”

San Luis Obispo, CA